Hey X.
I'm not sure if you'd be proud or disappointed by me today. I am conflicted myself and can barely think clearly.
Your presence clouds my concentration and it's getting harder. I can feel myself working against you unwillingly and have no power to fight it as much as I want to. It's only been a week and God please help me. I am incapable of your love and I'm sorry. Being weak is my flaw and I am starting fresh today. Perhaps in seven days time, I will feel completely different.
I made a joke about you yesterday. My friends laughed and one replied seriously, " Don't do that to us." She alone has a slight idea about you and I am worried and I must hide you. I just giggled and waved my hand, to show that you were nothing to me. I lied. You are everything. You consume me and it sucks but it's beautiful.
With peace,
Thanhy xoxo
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