19 October 2014

GOODBYE

Hey everyone :)

This will be my last post.

I'm writing and rewriting this because I can't seem to form the words the way I want to make them sound. I don't want to be dramatic or sad or casual because the truth is, this isn't a major decision and isn't sad but it does mean something.

I sound so illiterate right now. I'm finding it hard to make sense let alone make it well written!

I've decided to stop blogging because I don't think my posts reflected who I really am. I couldn't express myself. It was difficult for me to speak about personal things. I was unable to tell what seemed like the world what really mattered to me. I felt selfish if I burdened anyone with my troubles that seemed too trivial to be troubles.

See? Already I sound so dramatic.

When I first started blogging, three years ago (has it really been that long?!) I simply told you what had happened in my day and tell you what had crossed my mind. I've been reading through my own posts these last couple of days and I laughed at my writing. It's funny to see how much I've changed.

When I blog now, I only ever find the motivation to do so when I feel trapped or when I am in an overflowing pot of emotions. But even then, I cannot express myself openly. I worry that if I were to tell you all about what my italicised posts, the posts that really reflect me as of late, I would be ridiculed or pitied or judged. I didn't want that. I don't want that. I want to be able to write what I feel without caution. And I will do just that.

Thank you so much for sticking with me, as boring and childish and dramatic as I've been, you've been here. Thank you for listening and thank you for caring.

Sorry for being so dramatic ahaha.

Love you all.

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