GOODBYE

Hey everyone :)

This will be my last post.

I'm writing and rewriting this because I can't seem to form the words the way I want to make them sound. I don't want to be dramatic or sad or casual because the truth is, this isn't a major decision and isn't sad but it does mean something.

I sound so illiterate right now. I'm finding it hard to make sense let alone make it well written!

I've decided to stop blogging because I don't think my posts reflected who I really am. I couldn't express myself. It was difficult for me to speak about personal things. I was unable to tell what seemed like the world what really mattered to me. I felt selfish if I burdened anyone with my troubles that seemed too trivial to be troubles.

See? Already I sound so dramatic.

When I first started blogging, three years ago (has it really been that long?!) I simply told you what had happened in my day and tell you what had crossed my mind. I've been reading through my own posts these last couple of days and I laughed at my writing. It's funny to see how much I've changed.

When I blog now, I only ever find the motivation to do so when I feel trapped or when I am in an overflowing pot of emotions. But even then, I cannot express myself openly. I worry that if I were to tell you all about what my italicised posts, the posts that really reflect me as of late, I would be ridiculed or pitied or judged. I didn't want that. I don't want that. I want to be able to write what I feel without caution. And I will do just that.

Thank you so much for sticking with me, as boring and childish and dramatic as I've been, you've been here. Thank you for listening and thank you for caring.

Sorry for being so dramatic ahaha.

Love you all.

RECKLESS

And when I thought I had it all, I lost it.

Progress is slow and obstacles set me back distances that exceed my successes by far. I am unable to complete.

I tried to imagine a life without you today. I can't. 

VERY LAST

Hey everyone!

It's the last day of the holidays (cry) and ahh this sucks. I don't think I'm fully recovered yet haha.

Anyways because I did an abysmal job on keeping this blog updated lately, here are a few photos from the past week or so. I wish I had taken more photos but I was enjoying everything so much that I completely forgot!

Yen slept over for a few nights sometime this week to take photos for her assignment. This took half a day and for the other one and a half days, we ate literally everything *oops*

Forever in love w/ French Twist macaroons, they ran out of salted caramel though :(

Also went to French Twist with Stephy G the week before

Huong had her birthday party and whilst she was doing that, Diem and I went out for lunch with Kim and Yen at Shouk. Dying because their avo on toast is like heaven.

Went to Rogue Bar and Bistro to try their salted caramel pancakes. I ordered the mushrooms with truffled eggs and Diem got the pancakes and we just halfied. O M G

Trying to kick the caffeine habit failed miserably during these holidays

Anyways.

So I bought this book. I've heard so much about it. 

I actually don't know what to say. 

Have you guys ever read a book that literally leaves you speechless and unable to form a coherent thought about it? Like the absolute goodness amazingness of the book is just too much to deal with? It's been about a week since I read it. I finished it in less than three hours, it was just that good. I actually could not stop reading. 

I'm worried that I'm exaggerating about how good the book is and that you'll go out and read it and be disappointed so I'll stop now and just encourage you to read "Eleanor and Park" by Rainbow Rowell. Seriously. 

Loved it so much I went and bought her other book. Next on my list is Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell :)

With love,

Thanhy xoxo

MINE

I am surrounded by an abundance of people every day. But for now, the world is mine. There isn't anything in the world I cannot do and there isn't anything in the world I can't say. The world is mine. I can conquer. I can rule. I can pretend that it all matters because right now, the world is mine. 

Under my reign, conflict is inevitable. 

My mind is my world and my thoughts are at war every day. 

BEAUTIFUL DAY

Hey y'all! Day 4 of the holidays and this is seriously so sad. I'm up to Season 5 of Keeping up with the Kardashians and all I can think about is why only season 5?

Anyways, plans for today include :

• Paint shopping (dad's nearly finished my bedroom!)
• Season 5 of KUWTK

That's literally it. God, that's sad. But whatevs, it's been the most relaxing time I've had in a while.

With love,

Thanhy xoxo

IT'S OVER

Hey everyone! Sorry for my absence, but I AM FREE

IM FREE IM FREE IM FREE

It was honestly a horrible term so I'm so glad that it's over. I feel like 2 weeks is nowhere near enough to refuel but I'll take what I can get :)

I'm thinking it's going to be a pretty uneventful holidays, no set plans like last holidays but as per usual, here's my list

• Rogue bar and Bistro w/ Dim
• Grill'd w/ Huong
• French Twist w/ Stephy
• Riverbends w/ Dim
• Something w/ my asians hopefully
• Something w/ DPG hopefully

It's gonna be so chill, I love it. Anyways, I'm not even going to bother with catching you all up on the last two weeks so photo time!

Made breakfast for he birthday girl on Tuesday

End of school term = getting my core class fat

End of school term = my core class getting me fat

Pancake Manor w/ Friends yesterday

New phone case to match my tights

Cutest

With relief,

Thanhy xoxo

HEAD EXPLOSION

Hey everyone :)

I'm still alive but just barely lol, I actually don't know how I'm coping. The only thing pulling me through these stupid assignments is the fact it's all going to be over in 3 weeks PLUS next term is also going to be a million times better.

Next week is going to be hell and so will the week after that. But it's okay, I'm just focusing on not dying


With tiredness,

Thanhy xoxo

THE WOES OF YOU

And who are you to come barging into my life again? Were you expecting me to greet you as the one thing missing from my life? You were right. You came knocking on my door and with hello, made yourself at home in my never forgetting heart and head. I disappointed you before and you me but we can make each other happy. 

I disappointed you yesterday, when I was so good to you during the day but completely forgot about you by night time. 

I disappointed you today when I attempted to fix my mistakes from yesterday but forgot about you for two minutes. I'm learning though. Baby steps.

And I will disappoint you tomorrow when even at my best, I am not good enough for you. 

JUST WANDERING OFF

The loss of control and power scares me. 

Save me like you do. That should be easy, you were the one who showed me I was weak. 

Hey everyone :)

I'm feeling surprisingly calm for such a chaotic week but only one more day till relaxation/ study/ assignments omg freaking out now.

I just needed a break yah know, so I don't have much to say I guess. I'll feel a lot better when the weekened comes, I plan to do so much crap AHAHAH

• Finish drama assignment (halfway through yay!)
• Finalise Latin assignment (just draw a diagram and finish referencing)
• Complete and edit English (due next week holy moly)
• Write up Science up to experimental research (wanna kill physics, am not excited for senior physics :( )
• Hopefully complete Geography
• Not even think about History
• Health studies draft (literally handing in a page of notes)

Yah. Sounds like fun AHAH No but legit, I have to finish these, like I swear.

With procrastination,

Thanhy xoxo

SATURDAY LOVE

Hey everyone! Week 5 is finally over and it's so funny, I've got so much crap to do, I'm not doing any of it yet I feel completely calm. 

I have a feeling it's going to be a good day today. It's a Saturday so I have the whole day to work and stuff and yah.

Have a lovely weekend you guys!

With love,

Thanhy xoxo